There are many different types of separated couples. You might get along great with your ex or you might not be able to stand the sight of them. When you must co-parent with an ex, put the needs of your children first.
The goal is to create a stable environment for your children so that they feel comfortable speaking openly with you about their time with your ex.
Stick to the schedule
Whether you create a parenting schedule with your co-parent or the court creates one for you, stick to the schedule. Show up when and where your children expect you. Let your children know that they can count on you to be there. If you make changes to the schedule, do so through text or email so there is a documented record of acknowledgment from both parties.
Argue away from the kids
When disagreements with your ex occur, keep your children out of any arguments that arise. Speak with your ex over the phone when the kids are not in the room. Speak with your ex in public when the kids are not around. Find a way to keep your children away from fights with your ex. Do not give your children a reason to think they need to choose sides or defend one of you over the other.
Find a support system of friends or family you can count on to turn to when stressed or frustrated with your ex. Vent or work through your issues with other adults to avoid the temptation to speak negatively about your ex to your kids.